People like hearing yes, they don’t like saying it.

Chris Voss, a world class negotiator, shared this pearl in the Nudge podcast with Phill Agnew.

His point is we shouldn’t push for ‘yes’ because it makes people defensive.

Instead we should aim for ‘no’.

Rather than “Can we do this tomorrow?”, ask “Would you be against doing this tomorrow?”

Rather than “Is this a good time to talk?”, ask “Is now a bad time to...

Adding one simple word can make you more persuasive.

In a famous 1978 Harvard University study, a researcher would attempt to cut in line to copy some pages at the library.

In some cases they said: “Excuse me, I have five pages. May I use the Xerox machine?”  

In others, they asked the same thing except for adding a simple word. 

And this simple word made it 50% more likely they would be allowed to cut the line.

Here’s what they said.

...

We only hear from people who succeed.

Even if they reveal a failure, it’s because they’ve made it through.

That’s Survivorship Bias.

We think they represent the average when in fact it’s strongly skewed.

And seeing so many others succeed, or seem to, can get disheartening.

Take comfort knowing that the average experience is not success. 

It’s struggle.

If you'd like to struggle less, get in touch.

Should you say something is due in 5 days or it's due on Wednesday?

When communicating timeframes we have to decide whether to include the date, the day of the week and/or the number of days to go.

The language we choose can significantly impact how our audience responds.

Do we want them to think it's a short timeframe or a long one? Do we want them to act with urgency or do we want them to relax?

That's what I reveal in this clip.

See Just Do This for more.

The easiest way to endure an ice bath is to stay still.

A thermal layer forms, protecting you from the cold.

But the lack of movement becomes a problem the longer you stay in because you aren’t circulating blood as well to your extremities.

In business we might feel fine in our thermal layer. Comfortable even.

  But this is a long game. You’ve got to keep moving.

To disrupt the status quo and keep your business moving, see how to influence action.

When you tell a customer something is 125% better, they’ll think it’s only 25% better.

This is the Off by 100% Bias.

That new Black & Decker vacuum cleaner that claims to last 125% longer? Its performance will seem underwhelming.

Telling people their energy usage is 108% more than other households? They’lll underestimate how much of a power hog they are.

Of course, increasing their prices by 110% is likely to be underestimated, too. That is, until they get your...

Solve a problem for me, but remind me you are.

People generally stick with what they have if it continues to work. 

The problem for some businesses is they might solve it too well. 

The problem recedes in their customer’s mind so they start taking it for granted. Maybe I don’t need to keep paying for that? Maybe the problem has gone away? Maybe I can get it cheaper?

That’s why we need to keep reminding people what we’re doing. The load we’re...

Famously, the microwave was meant to save us hours of labour. Before that, washing machines.

But guess what? Abhorring a vacuum, our time was filled.

Right now, the technology promising to save us hours is AI.

Lawyers, accountants, marketers, we can outsource our transactional work. And we are.

But what then?

Why will people want to work with you instead of AI?

What makes you different? Valuable?

People skills.

Your ability to engage, persuade, refuse, refute.

Imagine if instead of...

Everyone has a toothbrush and no one wants to use someone else’s.

Just like ideas .

It’s a major issue within organisations.

See if this sounds familiar.

You gather for an ‘all in’ brainstorming session.

Flip charts. Post-It Notes. Textas.

There’s a flurry of ideas.

You’re given a bit of time to flesh out your best idea and then, standing before your peers, present your work.

People nod along and say good things. 

Meanwhile, what they’re...

When you ask hypothetical questions, you get hypothetical answers.

So why do we so often rush to ask our customers what they will do? What they will like?

When we pose these hypotheticals, we set ourselves and our customers up for failure.

Because intention doesn’t always translate into action.

Say doesn’t mean do.

Stop asking what they will do. 

 Start watching what they do do.

See: Influencing Action